In The Beginning...

Over the past week we have been studying the gospel of John.  I knew from the very beginning that this book was going to be a struggle for me. In a good way of course.  I remember telling my roommate that I could spend a week studying just the first chapter of this gospel.  It is so rich in meaning that I wanted to take time so soak it all in.  And indeed I tried.

A few days ago I was running and started asking the Lord what He wanted me to see through the study of this book.  The first thing that came into my head was, “In the beginning...” I laughed a little because in class one day last week I seriously forgot how Genesis 1 started. Like to the point that I had to go look it up (fail at being a pastor’s kid).  I still remember where I was on my run when I started thinking about Genesis 3:15 where God tells Satan that he has a sovereign plan to destroy him. AKA Jesus.

I am not ashamed to say that the past few months have been filled with anxiety for me.  For a while I kept it to myself, and it got to the point of misery.  I specifically remember driving through Atlanta in rush hour and crying out, “Lord, I don’t understand, make it go away!” (I am sure it was a sight for the cars next to me:).

Over the past few weeks the Lord has shown me that my anxiety is His power being made perfect in my weakness.  It has led me to see that spiritual growth is realizing how much more and more I need to cling to Him.  While I would love to be able to write out that my anxiety is gone, that is just not the case.  But I can say that whether I see it or not, the Lord is sovereign over it.

So while on my run that is when it hit me, “See, Anna Lauren, I was there from the very beginning.”  This is what is so clear in the first chapter of the Gospel of John.  From the very beginning God was sovereign over all and had a perfect plan.

As I prepare myself for the Christmas season, this is what I want to compel my worship of the Savior.  The sovereignty of God with a perfect plan through and extraordinary Savior.

Anna Lauren

P.S. Shout out to my Auburn friends that are procrastinating studying for finals by reading this! You can make it!